Disappointment

I've been a little scared to get back to this blog lately. Mostly because I am depressed and disappointed in myself, because after all my hard work last summer, I am sure I have gained back all the weight, and I can barely run a full mile without wanting to drop dead. I eat non stop and I hate myself all the time because of it. I'm ashamed that I let all that hard work go right down the crapper. I'm too afraid to get back on a scale. I have no time to exercise. Even though I don't really buy fattening foods I eat everything I see. I got rid of all my fat clothes so now I have nothing to wear. When I finally get the guts to get back on a scale and post it maybe that will finally be me breaking through this barrier and my start back to a healthier me. Till then.....

Getting my run on

I am finally up to 3.17 miles and it feels good. The heat is making it hard to run so this week has been a tough one with only one running day so far but it will be cooling down and I will be hitting the streets again. Wanna join me?

A few failures and a triumph

I have been trying new recipes for a while but I hit a slump with some bad ones. They were really bland and needed something added to them. I plan on trying them again before I put them up. But tonight was a good one.It is called South Pacific Shrimp and you can find the recipe here. The only thing I did differently is instead of peppers I added some japanese hot sauce and still tasted very good. It actually reminded me of a meal that my sister brought back from Thailand for me. All the seasoning was packaged and all I had to do was buy coconut milk and chicken and some eggplant. We put it over rice, I prefer brown rice but we didnt have enough so we put it over white rice. Very good.

On the Running Front

I ran 2.83 miles last week. My goal is 3 miles and I am so close. Unfortunately I got pretty sick this week and am still getting my strength back so I had not run since last Wednesday. Today my dear friend and cheerleader Trish got me to run two miles. It was hard since it had been over a week but I finished the two miles and now its time to get to 3. Hopefully by the end of next week. Run run run!

Finally I'm not overweight

I weighed myself on the Wii this morning. I'm wondering how accurate it is. But I did it twice and it was only a few ounces off. So according to the Wii I am now 154 and I am no longer in the overweight category. I have been running at BC Stadium and I finally ran a mile last week. I also run/walk the stairs. I actually felt like I was gaining weight each week and I thought that couldn't be possible since I was exercising so much. I wasn't eating great but it wasn't extreme. I think I was just retaining water or something. I hiked somewhere around 11 miles in the mountains this week and hopefully that helped too. Hopefully I can keep this up and improve my eating and the rest of the weight will just melt off. I also need to work on toning. I registered for the Volkslauf so I have a goal I have to reach by Oct 2nd. I have to be able to run 3 miles. I also have to be strong enough to pull myself over those 10 ft. walls. We'll see.

One New and One Old

Let me start with the old recipe. I have made this once before and we liked it but this time it was soooo much better because I made some changes. I got this recipe from the Better Homes and Gardens cook book and you can get it here but I will tell you the changes I made.
First I made a whole wheat pizza crust instead of all white flour. You can get a recipe for whole wheat pizza crust anywhere. The Eating Well website has a good one. I cant remember which one I used but next time I will try one that only calls for whole wheat flour and no white flour. I also didnt use any meat, it was vegetarian. I made the crust then baked it for a few minutes. Then I took some black refried beans and heated them up in a pan with some fat free milk, maybe half a cup to soften them up and make them easier to spread. I spread the beans on the crust and then spread taco bell sauce over the beans and added the green chiles and cheese. I baked that for maybe 4 minutes then pulled it out and added the lettuce and tomatoes. I only used half of the dough so the crust was pretty thin but it was really good.

Next is the new recipe. These are called Spiced Apple Cider muffins. They were really good. It calls for maple syrup which I didn't have but they were fine with out it and even fewer calories from the missing sugar.
Here is the recipe

Spiced Apple Cider Muffins

Streusel:

• 2 tablespoons packed light brown sugar
• 4 teaspoons whole-wheat flour
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1 tablespoon butter, cut into small pieces
• 2 tablespoons finely chopped walnuts (optional)

Muffins:

• 1 cup whole-wheat flour
• 1 cup all-purpose flour
• 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
• 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
• 1 large egg
• 1/3 cup packed light brown sugar
• 1/2 cup apple butter, such as Smucker's
• 1/3 cup maple syrup
• 1/3 cup apple cider
• 1/3 cup low-fat plain yogurt
• 1/4 cup canola oil

Directions

Preheat oven to 400°F. Coat 12 muffin cups with cooking spray.

To prepare streusel: Mix brown sugar, whole-wheat flour and cinnamon in a small bowl. Cut in butter with a pastry blender or your fingers until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Stir in walnuts, if using.

To prepare muffins: Whisk whole-wheat flour, all-purpose flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, cinnamon and nutmeg in a large bowl.

Whisk egg and brown sugar in a medium bowl until smooth. Whisk in apple butter, syrup, cider, yogurt and oil. Make a well in the dry ingredients; add the wet ingredients and stir with a rubber spatula until just combined. Scoop the batter into the prepared muffin cups (they'll be quite full). Sprinkle with the streusel.

Bake the muffins until the tops are golden brown and spring back when touched lightly, 15 to 25 minutes. Let cool in the pan for 5 minutes. Loosen edges and turn muffins out onto a wire rack to cool slightly before serving.

I had a feeling...

Last month when I weighed in I had a feeling the Wii was wrong. I need to buy a scale. So when I got on this morning it said I had lost 6.4 lbs but the weight was 168. So I think last month was way wrong. However I am in the 160's and I am still closer to my goal than I was a year ago.